Being Feminine

As suggested by the title of this post, I will be discussing ways in which I have strayed from being feminine and ways that I have succeeded. I just finished reading an article on Thought Catalog by Caitlin Leggett, titled, "50 Ways To Be A Woman." This article has many useful items on it that any woman should at least think about, if not use them to improve herself. Now, I understand that fifty items seems like a lot, so I have selected a few that I will focus on.

1) Forming Opinions on Political Matters and Current Events
I recall on one of my last days of my Junior year of high school, three boys sitting near me in class got into a discussion about religion and social issues such as abortion and homosexual marriage. I was so impressed by how my classmates argued their points and were able to contribute towards different ideas brought up. One of the boys, who took a more conservative stance, kept looking at me as if waiting for me to contribute. However, I stayed quiet and let them speak. Of course I had opinions on the topics, but hadn't been keeping myself up to date on current trends and felt like I would just be repeating their opinions. Keeping myself up to date on current events is something I need to work on.

2) Allowing Men to Treat Me Like A Lady
I've grown up being the tomboy sister of the family. I was always told that I was big boned, so took that to mean that I should be more physically fit. In P.E. class, I'd actively participate in the sports. Whenever I moved houses, my dad and I would do most of the heavy moving, while my sisters just did some of the lighter stuff. I saw myself as more "manly", and therefore unworthy to be treated like a woman. I also saw myself as unattractive and doubted that any guy would ever think to pursue me. So I opened my own doors, picked up guys' pencils with they dropped them, and took on the manners of men. When a guy would try to treat me like a lady, I'd compete with them to treat them like the lady. NO MORE OF THIS. I need to let myself be treated as the lady now. It's okay to have some masculine traits, but the way I've been going about utilizing them is innappropriate.

3) Using Social Media to Present Myself Positively
I don't often use social media, just to chat with some close friends. I didn't always use it for that reason. I used to post ridiculous status updates on Facebook, and post unattractive photos of myself, and then feel insecure that nobody was liking my posts. That is probably why my usage of social media has declined. I now only post photos or statuses when they are representative of importance to me.

4) Do Not Develop A Reputation As A Gossip
I think gossiping is one of the most unattractive things that a person can be caught doing. If you have a problem with someone, you should confront them about it. I find it especially degrading when I myself am gossiping. I want to present myself in a positive manner, so when someone comes to me wanted to initiate gossip, I try to deflect the negativity. If someone said something about me, and someone else tries to tell me about what they said, I take the other person's side.

"Oh they said that? I can see why they would think that." Then I try to compliment them, which usually surprised the person that was intending to start some drama. I'd rather have a reputation as someone kind than someone who talks about other people negatively behind their back.

5) Know There's A Time and Place for Everything
Timing is so important in life. There are times when you need to act, and times when you need to lay back and just wait for the right time to act. I've had my fair share of mistakes where I acted too soon, and they came back to bite me in the butt. Patience is suppose to be a virtue, not a virgin.

6) Finding Beauty in Everyday
I actually love this idea. Going through my days without taking the time to appreciate my surroundings tires me out. I forget that there is beauty all around me in many forms. Yesterday, it rained a bit, and afterwards, the sky looked absolutely gorgeous. I didn't think much about the sky when I was looking at it, but today, I'm thinking that that sky was pretty beautiful at the time.

7) Have Ambitions and Pursue Them
Goals are more likely to be pursued when they're written down. That's why governments have written constitutions. Lately, I haven't been making my goals clear, which makes it difficult to know what I am working towards. I know that I'd like to have a job in the future where I help people, but that's just too ambiguous. I love to write, sing, and draw. I suppose I am pursuing my writing by posting it on this blog rather than in my journal.

8) Respecting Myself
There was a time when I didn't respect myself, and I put myself last in many situations. I forgot who I was doing things for, and became blind to purpose. It's okay to compromise, but not when it becomes damaging. Keeping myelf well tidied, staying positive, and respecting others are all ways to respect myself. Determining my goals and taking time to pursue them is how I'll know I'm doing a good job at that.


There were many more other points that Leggett made in her article about being feminine, which I wholeheartedly believe in. These are just the ones that I could directly relate to and write about. Stay positive, friends. Happy Sunday!